Naa Song Saan!

This past week while thoroughly enjoying my arrival back in Chiang Mai with my friends, I was also busy attempting (*key word*) to learn very basic Thai at Chiang Mai University.

The CMU TEFL course offered its attendees a week-long Thai language course on campus, which my peers and I were excited to attend, as we had been wandering around Thailand without any official linguistic guidance for weeks.

Walking in the door the first day, I was quite anxious (who isn't on the first day of any class?).  I had already attempted to learn a few phrases during my time abroad, and it just wasn't sticking.  I felt better when one of my classmates who has been living here and dating a Thai girl for over four years was only able to produce a few phrases with proper intonation, though he could understand far more of what was being spoken than the rest of us.

I've become unbelievably comfortable with looking crazy because of the language barrier I am currently living with.  Whenever a waitress or barista asks me something as simple as "Do you want a straw?" I simply smile at them and politely hand over my money.  They probably are starting to think that gingers are mutes or deaf.  I can't say that I've given them much reason to doubt that thought...

Surprise from a great friend back home that I received this week!

Between the complete indifference to comprehending Thai that I'd developed over my short time abroad and the understanding that I would never speak like a local, I had managed to keep my expectations for the class cynically "realistic".  I was extremely excited that my friends from the TEFL course would be joining me during the week, which meant I would at least have some familiar faces to giggle with while confusing words like "come" and "horse" - both pronounced maa, just with indecipherable tonal changes to an outsider.  "Waiter, horse here, please."  Yep, it was going to be an interesting week.

As karma would have it, I had a moment during my teaching in February that served as a good reminder of the value of students speaking in class even when they are unsure of pronunciation. Without taking risks, you would never get anywhere, and you would most certainly never learn a new language.

In the class I taught I was conducting a lesson about "What could we order in a cafe?" a student bravely raised her hand and said she "would like a snake with her coffee".  For a moment, I found myself thinking, "is that something you could actually order here?"  I had been going to the same coffee shop practically everyday, and hadn't noticed any serpent-filled lattes, but I usually was still half asleep when ordering - had I seriously missed this??  I had the student repeat it, and she insisted two or three more times that she wanted a snake, each time gaining the confidence that a language teacher loves to see in an otherwise quiet student.  Instead of being filled with pride, my brain went into overdrive bouncing between thoughts: "Ok self, what would she be trying to ask for in a cafe in the USA, definitely not a python", "Dear God, Nikki don't actually burst out laughing at this poor girl's snake request", "I should ask her which cafe she goes to, and stay away from there", and most appropriately for me "Nikki - she won't understand whatever sarcastic comment you're conjuring up, so just move on."  A few seconds of my face being seriously contorted in thought, I realized she meant to say snack.  This is one example from my month of teaching.  I think our teacher had about a thousand of these moments an hour with us.

Aom, our adorable and extremely patient teacher, has been teaching Thai courses to international students at CMU for years and insisted on wearing a microphone to ensure all six students heard her clearly.  Thailand is known as the Land of Smiles, and being true to her nationality, Aom never stopped smiling, and because of her positivity neither did we.  Between laughing as Aom asked us to repeat phrases (or at least try to) after her such as "What do you like to eat?", "Let's go on a walk together" and "Would you like to dance with a lady boy", she taught us many new facts about Thai culture that have explained certain aspects of daily life that we've seen in our time here, but not quite understood.

One of the many interesting things I've found by "Getting Lost"

For example, farangs, or foreigners, are always complaining that they get lost when they come to Thailand, even when they have asked for directions from a local.  It is also important to note here that while giving directions, whether they are correct or not, Thai locals have on the largest, most genuine smile you have ever seen, which automatically fills you with false sense of confidence in the information you've just received.  Aom explained to us that there actually are not words in Thai that are used for detailed directions like in English, nor do people usually give directions in Thai.  You can say go right, left, or straight, but when it comes to the directions we use such as "after the third light, veer right at the fork, turn left immediately, and then two blocks down the store will be on your right" it simply is lost in translation.  Aom tried to calm our disbelief by cooing "Naa song saan," which roughly translates to our ever-present "bless your heart" back home in the South (she said this about 300 times each lesson).  She continued.  "Why do you need to go to this place you are asking for?  If someone knows another place that is good, then maybe you should like the place they are suggesting instead."  Wait, seriously?

She continued on that "maybe someone's brother owns a nice cafe that you should visit or the person you're speaking with knows of a beautiful garden you should see that is closer than where you are going."  Yeah, maybe, Aom.  Or maybe I have to catch a flight at the airport, or go to a meeting, or maybe I am planning to meet a friend somewhere specific?!  She just laughed at our shocked expressions and told us "that is why you can not rush in Thailand; no one is ever on time, and that is ok.  If you keep asking for directions from locals you will never be able to leave because you will keep wandering around, but why would anyone want to leave?"  Good point, Aom.  

A few more things I've stumbled upon in Chiang Mai, Thailand

For those of you who know my quite frank disregard for timeliness (some would say my honest to God inability), you know what happiness this new lesson brought to me - I finally found a place where running into a friend or simply wanting to grab a coffee that would take at least 30 minutes to create (snake coffee takes an extra 5 minutes) would not only not be seen as rude or impolite, it was actually encouraged.  Have I mentioned that I love Thailand?

Computer Learning

Throughout the week, Aom employed slightly untraditional techniques for teaching us Thai such as making certain animal gestures while shouting how to say the different names that we might encounter at a market or on a menu - example, imagine growling like a bull and then loudly reciting "COW COW COW".  (Did I mention I checked my pride at the door when I passed through Immigrations upon my arrival to Thailand?)  We learned to count to ten by doing a line dance that would make my Texan friends cry.  And because of our extensive practice with the phrase "lady boy" we can now ask almost any statement regarding or potentially including this Thai speciality (if you don't know what a 'lady boy' is then I'm sorry to disappoint, but I won't be explaining it to you here; this blog is PG).


Without fail, everyday we made fun of one another (always prompted by Aom), endlessly laughed at ourselves, and shook our heads at Aom's Thai cultural fun (and equally as frustrating) facts.

By Friday, we left the class actually being able to recognize words, create the five Thai tones, and confidently attempt to string a few words together to fend for ourselves in the real world.  But no, I still don't know how to say "I don't need a straw, thanks."